Or at least. . . I am attempting to be satisfied in my life right now.
I’ve been worrying too much lately. So much is going to be changing for us soon and I’ve struggled to feel any kind of peace about it all. I feel anxious and tense about all these things I can’t really control. I’ve been trying so hard to figure out what it is I’m supposed to be learning or doing because of these experiences. And the thought that’s been creeping into my head is that maybe I am supposed to be learning to be satisfied with life as it is.
I need to be satisfied with the fact that Kenny has already been accepted to some really great law schools and that we just might end up somewhere besides California. I need to be satisfied with our financial situation and realize that right now, we make what we make. I need to be satisfied with how many weddings I’ve booked. The number of lenses I have. The growth of my business. The fact that I’ll be starting it all over somewhere new. I also need to be satisfied with the progress I’ve made towards eating healthier. The length of my hair. The size of my wardrobe.
The life-changing and the trivial, I just need to be okay with life as it is.
I really deeply believe that we have the power we have to change and improve our own lives, but sometimes I think about “the next thing” too much. I need to realize that right now, what I have been given is enough. It is more than enough. So my new mantra: to be satisfied with what I have.
P.S. I took this self portrait in my bedroom partly because of the pretty light, but mostly because that is where the majority of my worrying happens. . . while I lay in bed attempting to go to sleep each night. From now on, I am determined to quit letting those thoughts invade my nights. I know they will during the day (as much as I try to control them), but when I lay down in my bed at night, the worrying must stop and the appreciation must begin. :)
8 comments
Oh Kristin, it’s weird how much I worry about those same things all the time! I even had a reeeally long conversation with Paul this week about stuff just like that and we both came to the conclusion that I worry too much too! Women are worriers, but at the same time, I love how you are focusing on just being satisfied. And I feel like sometimes that’s all I can do, and then when I look at all I already have, it helps lessen the worry, even if it’s just for that day. :) Let’s hang out soon!
I said this on Facebook, and I’ll say it again! You are gorgeous. And I love your perspective! I just might Evernote this post for a good read later when I’m feeling like what I have is not enough. xoxo
I love that picture. You’re so pretty!! And… we should get together and talk about worrying. :)
That picture is abosultely gorgeous!! I loved the light and the angles and of course you’re stunning in it. I hope you guys figure out everything you need to for law school!! I’m still crossing my fingers for California.
What a beautiful photo! I really liked this post! It’s a good reminder for me to have better perspective of the things that matter most.
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This picture is SO lovely I pinned it! :D P.S. I swear that price list is coming soon. Thank you for your patience! :)
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